32 Weeks and feeling good!
I'm in the middle of week 32 of this pregnancy. This week has been a turnaround week. A week ago, I was on day 2 of a 3 day period of being bed ridden from pain related to SPD. I went to the chiropractor on Tuesday, and again on Friday. I've had some pain off and on this week, but this weekend has been amazing. Even spending all day on my feet and running around I've been relatively pain free. As pain free as you can be when there is a uterus up to your ribs and little jabs to your muscles from inside your body. ;) I don't think 32 weeks has felt this comfortable since my first pregnancy. Considering that was 3 kids, 8 pregnancies, and 6 years ago, I'm happy!
My other 3 were born in the 36-38 weeks range. Which means nothing, as we all know. I could have a baby in 4 weeks or in 10 weeks. As someone obsessed with details and planning, the last couple of months of pregnancy are maddening as I constantly wonder when to expect baby to come. Especially since I tend to have weeks of prodromal labor.
This pregnancy has been the first one where birth place has been a real discussion. My first I was sure would be in the hospital. People went to OBs and had babies in hospitals. Homebirth was for the crazy hippies. I'm sorry if I sound like I'm mumbling, that's just my foot in my mouth. After a good natural hospital birth, I still knew there was a better way. Better than a first time mom being told after 9 hours of labor that she was failing to progress and being threatened with a cesarean section. Better than waiting over an hour for every single prenatal visit in a crowded waiting room only to be seen for five minutes. Better than an OB who dismissed my hyperemesis as me being a "princess" about normal morning sickness and told me not having an epidural would result in myself having a stroke from high blood pressure (due to a heart condition I'd long outgrown, and even suffering from low blood pressure the entire pregnancy!). Better than postpartum women treating me like I knew nothing because I was a young mother.
Two years later I found myself pregnant again. I knew I would have a homebirth. The question that pregnancy was whether or not I could find a midwife to attend. I was okay with an unassisted birth when a friend found a midwife for me through a message board. I met with her, and transferred from seeing a hospital based CNM to seeing a homebirth midwife. And still wound up with an unassisted birth thanks to a snowstorm, another birth, and being a fast laborer.
By the time I was pregnant with baby number three, there wasn't a question of where (home) or attendant (same homebirth midwife), but instead how we were going to replace the tub that came with the home we'd bought the year before with a new one deep enough to facilitate a waterbirth. That birth, another fast one (just a smidge over 2 hours), was easy. Smooth, quick labor that progressed with no issues and ended in a peaceful waterbirth with the midwife and my husband near the tub and my two older girls in the hallway laughing in delight over the birth of their sister.
This pregnancy, however, has been full of questions. We are seeing our family doctor for prenatal care, and have intended to birth at home unassisted from the beginning. This decision has been one I've considered and reconsidered. I admit the hospital has it's appeal. Not for the birth itself, though their tubs do look amazing. But for the 2 days post birth with no having to clean up, tend to older siblings, having food delivered to me with the push of a button, etc. It's a mini vacation for a tired mama with lots of little ones around! And with our doctor, I know all of my wishes would be respected during labor and birth. I wouldn't have to get an IV, I could eat and drink and move as I pleased, catch the baby myself, and anything else I could ask for. Sounds great, but with the fast labors, the whole being in a car sounds like torture. My contractions tend to come fast and strong. They are manageable when I can do whatever I need to to cope. But in a car they are unbearable (experienced during those weeks of prodromal labor).
For all three girls, the only options were hospital or home. Now, a new birth center is opening in the area. Right near the hospital, actually. A LOT of my friends are very excited about this option. As am I, because it means many local women who were not happy with the current options of unregulated homebirth midwives or the hospital have a new option. One that gives them great care and a non-hospital option that has the bonus of being covered by insurance; something that is usually impossible with homebirths here. I have many friends who are already excited about getting to have their next baby in the birth center. It opens later this month, and since my doctor is the physician who works with the CNM running the center, I can easily switch care to birth there if I chose to.
And I do see the appeal. A real bed rather than the incredibly uncomfortable hospital ones. Big tubs (I am a water birther, the bed is of no matter to me, but the tub? The tub is everything!), no hospital-y feel to the place. And you get to go home within a few hours, so you can settle into your own bed with baby that first night. And the scary "who cleans up the mess" question all of us homebirthers hear is answered. I am pretty sure you can also have family visit before you leave the center and then when you get home, you're home in peace and alone. That is probably an even bigger draw than the tub for me, as I'm a private person and rarely am comfortable inviting others into my home. Even friends and family.
But, where I am now, the birth center option is just not for me. It seems like it would be silly. We can have everything we want at the hospital. If this wasn't the case, a birth center would be a good option for us. The hospital seems kind of crazy as well. We wouldn't be going because we think it is the best or safest place for our birth, but rather to simply have the hotel-like amenities after the fact. I still feel the best place would be home for us. Sure, it means no 2 day vacation afterward. But as long as I do my meal prep and keep up with laundry before the birth, there won't be much to do after around the house anyway. Plus my husband will likely have a couple of days home to help out. Add in the fact that I don't tend to take a ton of rest time after a birth anyway (we were out to eat and shopping 12 hours after my last birth since our birth kit was missing a few items and we got hungry) and staying home just makes sense.
So for now, we say we're planning a homebirth. Come birthing day, we may decide the hospital sounds like the place for us. We have a doctor and doula who are fine supporting us wherever we decide to go. Or not go. So the following weeks will involve putting together our birth kit, preparing the house for a birth, and packing a bag in case we decide at the last minute to head to the hospital. I don't see that happening, but this pregnancy has been so all over the place that I do not make concrete plans anymore. All I know is that in the next 4-10 weeks we will be meeting our new baby. And no matter where or how they enter this world, it will be joyful and miraculous. Just like my other births, and any others that God plans for us.
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